Don't all laugh at once

A friend did actually joke yesterday that I should change the title of my blog to "Does my bum look fickle in this?" as the rate at which I am about facing from saying something is utterly grim to wanting them in every colour has reached epic proportions. 

I fear I may be having a mid life crisis.  I already have a tattoo (pathetically small and woeful and done at the age of 23), I'm too much of a wuss to have anything else pierced and... errr.... what else do women do when they're having a mid life crisis?

Oh yes, I know.  Say they dislike something very fashionable and then five minutes later, extoll the virtues of said hideous item from the rooftops.  Fickle, oh yes.  Does anyone die?  No. (well apart from my the 9yr old - apparently from embarrassment.) 

So all in all the only thing that is at stake here is my sanity and hell, I'm pretty sure that was questionable anyway, so in we go. 

The Fugly Sandal.  Except that I don't think it's really that fugly anymore. 

This, like the two previous items of footwear this year that I have barfed at and then bought, I have researched with the intention of blogging and saying how I disliked them intensely and whilst I thought other people could rock them, I would be sticking with my dainty ankle strap/thong/thin sole leather numbers, thank you very much. 

Except I clearly have an innate ability to convince myself that the more I look at something, the better it becomes.  Well, with footwear anyway. 

I think it's pretty easily summed up to be fair.  Basically I start with an item that seems totally alien to me (each of the aforementioned pieces of footwear for a start).  And I hunt them out in magazines, online, I look at them in shops and I try them on.  

And before I know it, what had seemed the height of oddness, suddenly becomes much more familiar.  The gorgeous people I see in print, online and in real life seem impossibly cool and glamorous in said grim item. 

Like I would be (I said don't all laugh), if I were to buy a pair.  For sure.  No?  

Mid

Life

Crisis (she says whilst typing wearing a pair of leopard print skate shoes that have barely left her feet since she bought them) 

If all I have to lose is my credibility and £30odd, then I'm going in.  At the (high) risk of being ridiculed, I may be about to embark on a fugly sandal search.  Seeing as my usual tan sandal quest wasn't the most successful for me - there are some lovely ones out there but none of them floated my boat and I think I now know why.  My head had been turned. 

The one thing in my favour is my skate shoe experience.  Which has been amazing.  I have just had a coffee with one of my closest friends who, when I said I was getting them a couple of weeks ago, guffawed, ridiculed and sneered.  Today she fessed up, hoovered in a massive dose of humble pie and said she was going to get some.  HA!  I then proceeded to launch into my new found crush on the sandal - much eye rolling, followed by an admission that she's sure she'll end up with a pair come half term.  

Let the eye rolling continue en masse with my first foray into the world of the fugly sandal.  Can I please point out that we are very much on a suck it and see venture right now - but I have (faintly ridiculous) high hopes.....

Ok so starting with these from Zara.  I took this photo in an attempt to show how utterly foolish these monstrosities were.  But ummm, I quite liked them.  Now I do not want pink, of that I am sure.  Totally sure.  And I'm positive that there will be many of you that still think these yack. 

Color Bio Sandal from Zara £29.99  These are actually the size too big for me. 

Even these from River Island which I thought would be verging on Lazy Town tastic - whilst I won't be buying them, didn't make me want to throw up. 

I genuinely think they look a shed load worse on the shelf and on a footless pic. 

Silver metallic chunky sole sandals £50

I am absolutely positive there are loads of you now shaking you head and reading this with pity on your faces.  I was that woman.  I've been sat where you are and, I'm either having a nervous breakdown (to be fair, this is a possibility) or I've struck sandal gold (at the very least a shade of bronze).  I think these might work. 

Here are ones which I am going to track down.  The trick is to filter out the super comedy numbers (and no it's not all of them.  Shhh) and hit the yoof fashion sites.  

Topshop and ASOS have the market covered. 

Starting with pool slides.  In white they may be every so slightly Swimming Gala Timekeeper but once you get over that, the minimal edge to them is quite endearing. 

Frizz Leather Pool Slides £38 also available online in black.

Dare I say slightly more delicate 

Hi Pool Slide Sandals £22

Fever Poolside Sandals £35 also available in black.

ASOS have a double strap slider. 

ASOS Feodore Sliders £18

The Free Tread Flatforms £38 in white  Although I would say it's more of a creamy snakeskin.  Also in black online.

Now I would have to draw the line personally (she says - yeah right) at what I see to be the Startrite version of the summer sandal but I can see that to some there will be no difference in fugliness to any of the rest and they do belong in here.  This is not the style that I'm after mind.  I appreciate I'm splitting hairs. 

Haven Footbed Sandals in holographic silver - £28  also available in black or white. 

Back in the room now and upping the ante a bit at Whistles. I guess you have to be sure you love them to spend this much.  They are less of a modern supercharged sole though which may appeal and I love the unusual colour.

Whistles Amber Edgy Black/White Sandals £135

These are a bit more out there mind you in black patent. 

Whistles Holly Black Flat Strap Sandals £135

Another similar version but in silver from ASOS 

ASOS Full Monty Sandals £35

Or in Black £35

Now if I can't persuade you on these, I can't persuade you on any of them.  I defy anyone not to think for the first two seconds that these were Marni.  If I shoved these in a Matches box, no-one would ever know.  (ok so I'd scrub out the New Look label first, but for under £20?!) 

New Look Glide Minimal Flat Sandals £17.99

These from Aldo I really do rather like and again I think look like they could grace the likes of Net-A-Porter (honestly there are oodles of these on there for prices that make you cry)

Aldo Parramore Bone Footbed Flat Sandals £55

A slightly less in your face version, with just a nod to the theme with the slightly thicker sole can be found at Bertie. 

Bertie Jar Leather Flat Sandals in Black £59 - also available in tan

So I think that is enough food for thought for one night.  You may have noticed that there has been no mention of anything with a cork base or a jelly version.  Well.  I'm not going to pontificate about how much I loathe anything Birkie looking as clearly I will have a pair in every colour and style before I've finished the post but at the moment, suffice to say, they're not for me.  And I'm not even going to mention anything jelly.  I'm 41 for the love of the lord. (glossing over the fact I've been trawling Topshop, River Island, New Look and ASOS for sandals.  Details schmetails)

Today - final day of week one of the hols.  Another round robin of stuff trying to keep various children entertained.  It's easier than when they were babies, that's all I'm going to say.  Oh and it's not raining. 

Maroon and bone breton top - Massimo Dutti

Saxby Boyfriend jeans - ASOS 

Cream quilted jacket - Zara

Cream stone necklace - Anthropologie

Cheetah print skate shoes - Next

Stone maxi zip satchel - Anya Hindmarch

I can't wait to hear your thoughts about how I've totally lost my marbles.  Am looking forward to a huge trying on session next week now that I've got my head around them.  Feeling rather excited (and in need of a pedi...)